Issue 10

Low Test Scores
Blamed On
El Niņo
Fluffy The Bunny
Newman Sells
Derik Falky: Alive
And Well In 1998
Dionne Warwick
Knows All
Jurassic Calculus
Kesus To Order
Mail-Order Bride
Jukebox Malaise

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Issue 10

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Kesus To Order Mail-Order Bride
"I've Got Rubles To Spare!"

By Kesus
After a disappointing senior ball, I'm in the market for a new bride. I've been looking through a few catalogues, and for the money i spent on "senior b," I could have bought myself a firm Russian woman. By saving my money instead of waiting in bread lines, I'll have almost enough rubles to buy the "dominant" wife. She costs as much as two "docile" wives, but she's twice as much fun. Plus, she has been trained to speak with a faux-German accent, and who doesn't like a round German dominatrix?

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