Issue 3

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By M. F. Luder
What the hell happened to the Learning Center? It is the center of our school, where the inquisitive nerds can freely study and ponder without fear of wedgies coming from the testosterone laden classmates, but for some strange reason, people have started to refer to it as the "L.C." It would seem to the untrained observer that people just do not want to say 'learning center,' because it is just too long.

But I am not an untrained observer and that is not why L.C. is now the phrase. Certain people, who will remain unnamed (unless you have some donuts, yup, donuts with sprinkles) have decided to get rid of the name 'Learning Center' so they can complete their coup. These so-called administrators want to turn the "Learning" Center into a social hangout instead of the Mecca of truth and knowledge that it is now. I will shed a tear if this school loses Mr. Riccardi's forays to the learning center where he lets his students color to their heart's content; that is what the Learning Center is really about.

If people start saying 'L.C.' instead of 'Learning Center,' the connection between learning and the Learning Center will disappear; the L.C. would then become a hangout for the 'in' crowd, not the bastion of intellectual freedom that it should be. Unite my brothers; free us from this binding yoke of ignorance, instead give us the binding yoke of knowledge; give me a Learning Center, not an L.C.

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